Jinkle & Lockneed: No Guarantees

The following series is an expanded adaptation of my original Jinkle & Lockneed Twitter prompts. Jinkle is a snarky asshole and talks as such. Misspellings in Jinkle’s narration and dialogue are intentional.


“Alright, you’ve made your point, now get this dirt out of my eye!” Lockneed barked.

“Yeah, I’m not tha helpful type.” I said

“I summoned you, therefore you are at my command!” he squinted.

I sat, holding my chin “Am I bein’ an inconvenience 😗?”

“Damn you to oblivion, whelp!”

“Damn me? Do ya even imps, Bro?” Lockneed had by now relieved himself o’ the eye-dirt but his mood hadn’t improved. If anything it was even worse.

“You’re a bug, you pester people and that’s it. I’m sending you back!” Back? I can’t work any real chaos back there and that’s just not fun.

“Hold on, Mack,” I grinned, wide and wicked, “the tiniest of nudges can create a domino effect that leads ta grave consequences.”

“All you’re nudging is my temper!”

“Tut-tut, such a short fuse, Needy.”

“Do NOT call me that, imp! I am Lockneed, your master, and you will address me as so!”

“It’s Jinkle, not “imp“.”

“Don’t correct me!”

“Well if we’re on professional terms-”

YOU’RE DOING IT AGAIN!”

I would swear that there are days when my job does i’self.😏 Lockneed held his temples and took a deep breath.

“Okay. So you deal in minor annoyances and these minor annoyances can snowball into large-scale chaos.”

“You learn fast, Needy!”

“Look, Jinkle,” he groaned,”is there any way to keep your efforts off of me?”

“Nope! But if you supply me with a steady supply o’ other dopes ta target then I might not focus on you!”

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